I want to thank everyone who has entered my life, and wish them a Happy New Year! On New Years Eve, Debbie and I will have an early dinner, then we will proceed to the local IMAX theatre to see an action/adventure film in 3D. Hopefully, we will make it back home safely, and in one piece, before 6 or 7 p.m.
Recovering alcoholics and drug addicts like to call New Years Eve, "amateur night". It's an evening of automobile accidents, fights, murders, losses of lives, and limbs and finally the desolation for those who drink or drug too much. It is more painful for their innocent victims. So please, don't drink and drive.
My wife and I will kiss at midnight, and bring in the year of 2011, with Dick Clark, the "world's oldest teenager". I thank my higher power, that I won't have to wake up on New Years Day with a hangover. I still haven't forgotten the effects of those nasty things. Instead, my Debbie and I will go to the gym, after lounging over our coffee and newspaper.
I am blessed to have a loving, sweet wife, daughter, family, and so many great friends. You all make my life so special. I have enjoyed writing this journal. It truly is a labor of love. Journaling has become a vehicle for my emotions. I like getting in touch with my feelings, instead of burying them away. It is a purifying process for my soul. I hope to continue my writing, as long as I can draw breath on this beautiful spaceship, earth.
2011 will be a year of travel and companionship for Debbie and me. Debbie retires from the local college in April. I look forward to spending more time with my sweetie. I look forward to long walks, and beautiful sunrises and sunsets. I am excited about our new life together. We will be married for 31 years in May. I promise to put my pen and paint brushes away more often, so I can spend more time with my wife, who is also my lover and best friend. God bless you all, and may 2011 bring you health and happiness!
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
MY RESOLUTION
My resolution is to have no resolutions.
I plan not to be disappointed.
I don't dwell on the past.
Nor do I live in the future.
I work on today.
If I am successful today, then I am happy.
If I string enough successful days together,
Then the future takes care of itself.
Not every day is going to be a winner.
I don't let that deter me.
I just keep moving forward.
I am persistent in my goal seeking.
I learn from my mistakes.
I try not to repeat them.
If I string 365 pretty good days together,
I know I will have had a good year.
I don't need a resolution.
The way I live each day is my solution.
***
I plan not to be disappointed.
I don't dwell on the past.
Nor do I live in the future.
I work on today.
If I am successful today, then I am happy.
If I string enough successful days together,
Then the future takes care of itself.
Not every day is going to be a winner.
I don't let that deter me.
I just keep moving forward.
I am persistent in my goal seeking.
I learn from my mistakes.
I try not to repeat them.
If I string 365 pretty good days together,
I know I will have had a good year.
I don't need a resolution.
The way I live each day is my solution.
***
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
THE HUNTERS AND THE HUNTED
The hunter hunts.
He tracks his victim.
The hunter justifies his actions.
He claims he has a moral right.
The hunter makes the rules.
He is outfitted for comfort.
The hunter is well-fed.
He has nice lodging.
He has better equipment than the hunted.
The hunter claims to have a superior mind.
He sees the hunted as a disposable unit.
The hunted one must be culled.
Eradicated.
It has no rights.
This is the nature of the game.
We live in a violent world.
We say we hunt for loftier ideals.
Mostly, we hunt because we are greedy.
Animals hunt to survive.
Animals are more moral than men.
This makes me sad.
He tracks his victim.
The hunter justifies his actions.
He claims he has a moral right.
The hunter makes the rules.
He is outfitted for comfort.
The hunter is well-fed.
He has nice lodging.
He has better equipment than the hunted.
The hunter claims to have a superior mind.
He sees the hunted as a disposable unit.
The hunted one must be culled.
Eradicated.
It has no rights.
This is the nature of the game.
We live in a violent world.
We say we hunt for loftier ideals.
Mostly, we hunt because we are greedy.
Animals hunt to survive.
Animals are more moral than men.
This makes me sad.
Sunday, December 26, 2010
I AM REMOVED
I am removed
From the holiday groove.
They disapprove that I have the blues.
But what the hell?
I cannot gel.
With sophmoric things.
The swing and bling.
Dont ring my bell.
While they laugh and play,
I think of a way,
To find Santa Cruz.
Dive bars and booze.
The narcotic snooze.
Of those who are damned,
To peruse,
Words like this.
A poet's abyss.
I am confused,
By a "normal" mood.
There, I've said it again.
In the end,
I don't want to schmooze.
I care not to amuse.
I seek my muse,
So I am removed.
From the holiday groove.
They disapprove that I have the blues.
But what the hell?
I cannot gel.
With sophmoric things.
The swing and bling.
Dont ring my bell.
While they laugh and play,
I think of a way,
To find Santa Cruz.
Dive bars and booze.
The narcotic snooze.
Of those who are damned,
To peruse,
Words like this.
A poet's abyss.
I am confused,
By a "normal" mood.
There, I've said it again.
In the end,
I don't want to schmooze.
I care not to amuse.
I seek my muse,
So I am removed.
FAMILY CHRISTMAS
I thank the Great Spirit for Christmas.
I enjoy my family and friends.
I am warm and well-fed.
I enjoy the young and old.
I watch the children.
They are our future.
I pray for all who have passed on.
This is the circle of life and death.
I accept it all.
The journey is a good one.
I choose to feel good this day.
Now is the best of times.
I enjoy my family and friends.
I am warm and well-fed.
I enjoy the young and old.
I watch the children.
They are our future.
I pray for all who have passed on.
This is the circle of life and death.
I accept it all.
The journey is a good one.
I choose to feel good this day.
Now is the best of times.
Thursday, December 23, 2010
STUFFED ANIMALS
These inanimate objects are fluffy horrors. My baby daughter accumulated a bounty of them. She received them from the time she was born, until she was well into her teenage years. Stuffed animals accumulate along with germs, dust, mites, slobber, and other filth. Not only are they harmful to the health of children, but they are harmful to the health of the children's parents. I had to build toy chests to contain these raggedy, diseased monstrosities.
As more and more of them magically appeared in my home, they finally took over. I was a slave to them. There were a hundred of them gracing my daughter's bed. They lurked in closets, in the basement, in nooks and crannies, anywhere one could imagine.
I was attacked by one of them on a fine winter morning. It happened after I came down the stairs at 4:30 a.m. to fix my thermos of coffee for work. As my woolen-socked right foot met Mr. Teddy Bear, we both took a ride across my slick Pergo, kitchen floor. Teddy ended up against the wall, not feeling any pain. His dead button eyes stared at me. I on the other hand had smacked my lower back and buttocks hard, against the floor.
I stayed there for a moment to collect myself. The scotch I drank the evening before was rumbling in my stomach. My wife screamed at me from upstairs, "What the hell are you doing down there? You're going to wake up the dead!" I didn't answer her, because I felt too much rage rising up inside of me. I limped around for a while, and made my coffee. I threw some lousy sandwiches together for my "wonderful" winter's day on a CAT bulldozer in sub-freezing weather.
Today, my sweet daugher is all grown up, and living with her wonderful husband. I'm sitting in my clean den. Everything in here is pristine. It is beautiful, just the way I envisioned it to be for my retirement. But you know what? I'd trade just about anything to see my little girl on the floor again, playing with her stuffed animals. Maybe when I go Christmas shopping tomorrow, I'll buy her one, just for old times sake.
As more and more of them magically appeared in my home, they finally took over. I was a slave to them. There were a hundred of them gracing my daughter's bed. They lurked in closets, in the basement, in nooks and crannies, anywhere one could imagine.
I was attacked by one of them on a fine winter morning. It happened after I came down the stairs at 4:30 a.m. to fix my thermos of coffee for work. As my woolen-socked right foot met Mr. Teddy Bear, we both took a ride across my slick Pergo, kitchen floor. Teddy ended up against the wall, not feeling any pain. His dead button eyes stared at me. I on the other hand had smacked my lower back and buttocks hard, against the floor.
I stayed there for a moment to collect myself. The scotch I drank the evening before was rumbling in my stomach. My wife screamed at me from upstairs, "What the hell are you doing down there? You're going to wake up the dead!" I didn't answer her, because I felt too much rage rising up inside of me. I limped around for a while, and made my coffee. I threw some lousy sandwiches together for my "wonderful" winter's day on a CAT bulldozer in sub-freezing weather.
Today, my sweet daugher is all grown up, and living with her wonderful husband. I'm sitting in my clean den. Everything in here is pristine. It is beautiful, just the way I envisioned it to be for my retirement. But you know what? I'd trade just about anything to see my little girl on the floor again, playing with her stuffed animals. Maybe when I go Christmas shopping tomorrow, I'll buy her one, just for old times sake.
CHRISTMAS WAS AND IS
I remember the smell of pine needles from real Christmas trees in our house. We had them back in the day. My mom was always baking cookies. My sister helped her in the kitchen. My folks always made me go to sleep right after dinner on Christmas Eve. My dad and older brother were "magic elves" who assembled bikes and toys for me. My brother Jim was thirteen years older than I. My sis was ten years older. I was the baby of the family. Santa Claus was the excuse they used to get me to bed. We always opened our presents around nine-or-ten in the evening. I ripped through mine like a tornado! Sometimes we all went to midnight mass.
Later, when I grew up, Christmas for me was taking the Illinois Central train back home to Chicago from Carbondale, Illinois. I drank beer with other college students from my alma mater, Southern Illinois University. Fresh bodies got on the train from the University of Illinois, at Champaign-Urbana. We welcomed them because they had more beer! We sang Christmas songs in the club car, and shared marijuana cigarettes with old black porters.
When I got home, I met up with the neighborhood gang. Many were friends who worked in factories, or who were home from the war in Viet Nam. We shared tears over the ones we had lost. I remember Merry Christmas songs that were sung by Nat King Cole, Karen Carpenter, and Bing Crosby. I'm grateful that they still play them on the radio.
Christmas was delivering flowers from my brother's old shop on the south side of Chicago. Jim and I worked in that shop for forty years. We toiled there sixteen hours a day, for three or four weeks before Christmas. Jim and I both fell asleep, exhausted in our chairs on Christmas day, after mom's great meal and a few nips of whiskey.
More than anything, I would love to return to those special days in my mom and dad's home. I miss the sounds of joy and good smells. I miss the laughter and cheer. The abundance and energy of my sweet family and friends, seemed eternal to me. I thought it all would never end. But it did end.
Now, Christmas for me is bitter-sweet. My mom and dad, Jim and my sister Judy, haved passed on. I try not to dwell on this fact. Instead, I marvel at my sweet wife's energy, as she shops and decorates our home. Soon, it will be filled with guests, and the smells of good cooking. My daughter, son-in-law, his wonderful parents, and our closest friends and relatives will soon be here to celebrate Christmas Eve.
On this night we will share good cheer. We will think of Christ and the meaning of Christmas. We will pray, laugh, hug and cry. We will share tears of joy and love. We will pray for a good future for all the people of the world. I will bask in the warmth of today's Christmas, and make new memories for me and my family in the days to come. I wish you all a very, Merry Christmas! God bless you all.
Later, when I grew up, Christmas for me was taking the Illinois Central train back home to Chicago from Carbondale, Illinois. I drank beer with other college students from my alma mater, Southern Illinois University. Fresh bodies got on the train from the University of Illinois, at Champaign-Urbana. We welcomed them because they had more beer! We sang Christmas songs in the club car, and shared marijuana cigarettes with old black porters.
When I got home, I met up with the neighborhood gang. Many were friends who worked in factories, or who were home from the war in Viet Nam. We shared tears over the ones we had lost. I remember Merry Christmas songs that were sung by Nat King Cole, Karen Carpenter, and Bing Crosby. I'm grateful that they still play them on the radio.
Christmas was delivering flowers from my brother's old shop on the south side of Chicago. Jim and I worked in that shop for forty years. We toiled there sixteen hours a day, for three or four weeks before Christmas. Jim and I both fell asleep, exhausted in our chairs on Christmas day, after mom's great meal and a few nips of whiskey.
More than anything, I would love to return to those special days in my mom and dad's home. I miss the sounds of joy and good smells. I miss the laughter and cheer. The abundance and energy of my sweet family and friends, seemed eternal to me. I thought it all would never end. But it did end.
Now, Christmas for me is bitter-sweet. My mom and dad, Jim and my sister Judy, haved passed on. I try not to dwell on this fact. Instead, I marvel at my sweet wife's energy, as she shops and decorates our home. Soon, it will be filled with guests, and the smells of good cooking. My daughter, son-in-law, his wonderful parents, and our closest friends and relatives will soon be here to celebrate Christmas Eve.
On this night we will share good cheer. We will think of Christ and the meaning of Christmas. We will pray, laugh, hug and cry. We will share tears of joy and love. We will pray for a good future for all the people of the world. I will bask in the warmth of today's Christmas, and make new memories for me and my family in the days to come. I wish you all a very, Merry Christmas! God bless you all.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
