HOW I STAND

i stand erect
yet...
the wars have aged me
meandering streams cut through my hard substance
i weather the storms
somehow
rock-hard i thought i was
a man among men
of strong mind and body
pride is the foolishnes of the young
i never thought i might age
but age i did
denying it as i went along
it came to me anyway
like a dark night spectre
now at my side
my eternal companion
no more laughing girls
with ruby lips
no more sharing whiskey
with compatriots
no more fine cigars
or dancing the night away
greeting the morning sun
is an impossibility
for i am worse for wear
now
all of this is gone
and as i ponder what is left
under my covers
in the dead of night
i finally fall asleep
only to be awakened
by an insistent bladder
fitful sleep is the norm
and as i arise
i feel unbalanced and depressed
as i go to sleep
my aged fears return
somehow, the rest of my day is joyful
because i stand erect
i accept what is to come