I FELT

I felt the warmth of my mother's cheek.
I felt the warmth of the sun, as i lay in the prickly grass,
gazing in the sky at shapes of clouds, not a worry in the world.
I felt the grip of the Louisville slugger on endless days of baseball fields.
I felt denigration of youths laughing at my tattered jeans.
I felt rejection and isolation due to poverty and my father's alcoholism.
I felt talent rise within my breast, as I played music and read in my room.
I felt the hot breath of teen queens on my neck, at the drive-in movie show.
I felt the awe of being enveloped by the University machine.
I felt the rejection of the American mainstream business community.
I felt sweat, hate, fear, and hopelessness in a myriad of construction jobs.
I felt 'Big Man' heave his last breath of life in my arms...
as they pulled the boxcar off his battered body...
down in the crypt, known as Deep Tunnel.
I felt the deaths of my father, mother, sister, brother, and so many friends.
I felt my body deny me from too many bulldozers and too many cocktails.
I felt my innocence taken away by a John Wayne mystique, invented by the construction business.
I felt the last gasp on a Caterpillar tractor, knowing my lungs couldn't sustain my livelihood anymore.
I felt strangely liberated by my early retirement.
I felt reconnected with the essence of what is me.
I observed and felt more deeply the liars games.
I felt all the hurts of the world and let them go.
I felt my heart again.
I felt love for the right reasons.
I felt.