I NEED A SYSTEM RESTORE POINT

I need a system restore point, for my mind.
I need a firewall to keep all these bad thoughts, from coming in.
I have the "creepy crawlies", man!
My puter is rebelling again.
How many hours do I spend, glassy-eyed in front of this monster?
My freaking machine, with it's motherboard, and 'lectronic shit,
is driving me stark-raving, mad.
I swear I'm gonna' get my sledge hammer from outta' the garage,
and do it in for good!
Then for good measure, I'll destroy the tv set with all 900 channels, that have me surfing for tv shows, that I have seen over, and over again. Then I will smash my new Ipod which won't work on my Microsoft Windows XP, Professional, and anything else that goes "beep" or whistles, or whirs...
Whew! Calm down man, and breathe...yeah breathe.
I need to take a chill pill, or two.
I'm watching the blue bar now, loading up, ever so slowly.
So restore me already, gawl dangit!
Lord only knows what other tortures my puter is going to put me through, before it is done. I'm buying that "yeller dog" and boogeying out to Montana, for sure!
I'm gonna grow my own weed, and "hermitize" my ass.
I'll get a fifth of Wild Turkey, 100 proof, and start reading Thoreau.
I sick of techno-gizmo, screwups!
There, now I feel better.