The average life expectancy of the American male is 73 years. I am 61. I only have twelve fucking years left! This makes me nervous. How much time did I waste:
Cleaning toilets?...Worrying about shit that never happens?...Squeezing zits?
Talking to dis-interested females in bars?
Making confessions to sleeping, hungover priests?
Saying ten Our Father's, ten Hail Mary's, and ten Glory Be's?
Shoveling snow?...Raking leaves?...Watching mindless TV shows?
Sunbathing?...Shitting?...Urinating?...Washing cars?...Taking the garbage out?
Reading maintenance and instruction manuals?...Dusting?...
Waiting for water to boil?...Waiting in lines?...Surfing the Web?
Worrying about illness, death, bills, children, grandchildren, pets, insurance salesmen, impotence, sex, psychosis, alcoholism, drugs, women, psychiatrists, venereal diseases, politics, politicians, policemen, strange sounds, ringing in my ears, headaches, vertigo, depersonalization, castration, emascualtion, masturbation, socialization, constipation, exacerbation, lactation, variation, facial twitching, sleeping, not sleeping, eating, dreaming, ad infinitum?
Fuck it!...I'm sick of being negative. Maybe I'll live to be 83.