I WANT TO BE A SECRET AGENT!

When I am a secret agent man, I can have a fast car!
When your a secret agent, you have the best things life has to offer!
You get to have fancy clothes, and heels in your shoes that hide an assortment of dangerous things like: cyanide pills, mini-explosive devices, poison mini-darts, GPS trackers, and a myriad of other "neato" things! All secret agent guys get to wear expensive Tuxedos, and play baccarat with beautiful, sophisticated women at elegant casinos, on the French Riviera. "We" secret agents have tanned, muscled bodies, good looks just like Roman Gods, and we get to make love with beautiful, dangerous women every day of the week! We are drink top-shelf liquor, (shaken not stirred, please!), but we NEVER drink to excess! We need to have razor sharp minds and creative instincts, to deal with what ever issue is at hand. All of us are filthy rich and schooled at the finest Ivy League Universities. We travel all over the world, and speak at least 6 languages.

We do cool things like fencing, Kung Fu, and archery. All of us are masters at weaponry and warfare. We can assemble or dis-assemble anything mechanical, and put it back together in a "jack-split-second"! We all understand world governments and economies. We are masterful at hacking computer systems. None of us are married, because we don't like whining kids or cutting the grass. No secret agent man would ever accept a woman nagging at him to take the garbage out!

We are lone wolves who love excitement, danger, and romance! Ahhh! What a life! None of us ever have to worry about old age, because either we are assasinated or the governments or corporations we work for have us "eliminated" when our reflexes, mental abilities, or eyesight, starts "going south" on us...Gulp!!!!!

I don't want to die at 60! I can still have fun at this age! I guess I don't want to be a secret agent, after all. Shit! There's always something negative, that messes with my daydreams. Oh well! I can watch "Chuck" on TV tonight. I can live vicariously through him. I like the beautiful, blonde, female secret agent he hangs around with on the show, even if she does have crooked teeth. I wonder if she is Eastern European? I wonder if she ever waitressed at Alfie's restaurant? Damn! Now I'm thinking about the blog I wrote, a couple of days ago. I think I may be getting senile. At least I'm not a secret agent...whew!